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Dream. Believe. Run.


Marimar
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Hello everyone,

My name is Marianna and I am finally ready to make a new beginning with my life. I suffered from bulimia and I am still struggling with depression. I used to be fit and I enjoyed running, but suddenly depression came by and everything changed. Procrastination and loss of motivation led me to unknown paths. I started hating my body and I forgot how it was to appreciate life and how to be happy. Today is my first run and I cannot wait for it. I can't say that I have won this battle, but I am proud of myself and I want treat my body with respect and love. I must confess that I am feeling really weird right now, since it is the first time that I am publicly talking about this without any guilt or embarassement. I am afraid. I am afraid that I won't be able to complete the run. I am afraid that I am not strong enough. If you are reading and you are also afraid, you are not alone. Just remember that the hardest step is the one out of the front door!

Lots of love,

:)

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  • 3 weeks later...

Good morning Joanne (and pretty much everyone who is reading),

Yes, I did it. It was the best thing on that day. I still remember when I got home and I told my mother that I went running. I am not sure if she realised how I felt and I am not sure if I can describe it, either.

I am currently on Week 3. I repeated some of the days, since my body needed time to get adjusted and by no means I am going to push myself into that. I am still struggling with my breathing technique, but I think I am getting there. I added a fast sprint before my cooldowns and it feels good. It helped me get further with my performance. 

I am on holidays this week and I have the chance to take a small break, go swimming and relieve some stress. I am also struggling with my distorted thoughts about food. I am trying not to worry, because I know it takes time. Little by little, I am trying out different food groups that I used to label as "bad". I am slowly letting go of guilt and whenever I manage to control my hunger, I give myself a treat the next day! They say that eating disorders cannot be cured. I say " Watch me". We are not aware of how many amazing things our body is capable of. 

Take care,

Marianna :)

 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

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